I am an accredited psychotherapist and supervisor specialising in couples and relationship therapy.
I have been working in private practice since 2013 and have spent much of that time developing a particular interest and expertise in working with couples. Today, couples therapy is at the centre of both my clinical work and my wider professional life.
Alongside my private practice, I am the founder of the Institute of Couples Therapy, where I train and supervise psychotherapists who want to deepen their skills in working with relationships. I also provide continuing professional development for therapists and have been invited to speak on couples therapy and relationship dynamics at professional events, including as a keynote speaker. My work has also included media contributions on relationships and psychotherapy.
How I think about Relationships
Couples rarely come to therapy because they have not tried hard enough.
Usually, both people have been trying for a long time to make things better. The difficulty is that the ways we protect ourselves when we feel hurt, frightened, rejected, criticised or overwhelmed can become part of the very pattern that keeps the relationship stuck.
For me, couples therapy is therefore not primarily about teaching better communication techniques or deciding which partner needs to change.
I am interested in helping each person understand themselves more fully in relationship.
What happens to you when your partner moves towards you or away from you? What becomes difficult to tolerate? What do you do to manage that difficulty? And what effect does that then have on the other person?
In therapy, we try to understand the pattern rather than simply repeatedly addressing the subject of the latest argument.
Greater understanding does not automatically make relationships easy, but it can create greater freedom. When we can recognise what is happening inside ourselves and between us, we have more choice about what we do next.
How I Work
My approach is primarily systemic and differentiation-based, with influences from psychodynamic, Gestalt and developmental thinking.
I am particularly interested in the process taking place between a couple in the room: what is being communicated, avoided, defended against or enacted, sometimes without either partner being fully aware of it.
I do not see my role as taking sides, deciding who is right or persuading either person to become the partner the other wants them to be. Instead, I aim to create a thoughtful and challenging therapeutic space in which both people can become more curious about themselves, their partner and the relationship they have created together.
My Work with Therapists
Working with and teaching other therapists has become an important part of my professional life.
Through the Institute of Couples Therapy, I provide specialist training, supervision and continuing professional development in couples work. I am particularly interested in helping therapists move beyond techniques and become more confident in understanding the process unfolding between a couple.
My aim in training is not simply to teach therapists what to do. It is to help them develop how they think about relationships, therapeutic process and intervention.
Teaching also strengthens my own clinical work. It requires me continually to question my assumptions, articulate why I intervene in particular ways and remain engaged with new ideas in the field.
Professional Background
I am an IACP-accredited psychotherapist and IACP-accredited supervisor.
I have undertaken extensive postgraduate and specialist training in couples and relationship psychotherapy and continue to engage in ongoing professional development, supervision and study.
I have worked with couples for more than a decade across a wide range of relationship difficulties and life stages.
Contact
Karen Murphy
Turners Cross
Cork City
Email: mail@karenmurphy.ie